Wednesday, March 10th, 2010 Diary Entry
Even though I have been “emerging” from a low point, it is easy to slip back when one is unaware. I was complaining aloud the other day, and, yes, my negative magic had immediate effects- chaotic effects ;) I must keep reminding myself to cast positively. It is the same reason I am trying to stop watching/reading so much negative news. Like that the religion of which I am a member is acting in direct contrast to Christ’s teachings- not just occasionally, but now blatantly and destructively in that they are threatening to stop their charitable feeding of the homeless in Washington. Man… Jesus tries to improve his religion and… sometimes it seems like it’s not working.
So I must merely exercise my only power, which is love. I am not exactly a “frequency holder” as Tolle terms it… I am actually just slightly more active than that because I must be so. It is just that, though I have quite a relationship with you, Ganymede, it is not always easy to remember an impetus to love at ALL times, especially when practicing painful asanas or repetitive activities I disenjoy and judge as pointless. I know they are not any more pointless than anything else… but I almost want to cry at the futility.
Speaking of crying, Luken believes that, indeed, Andromache should not have cried- sometimes he calls me a baby when I cry- though he does not excuse the Greeks their violent activities. =/
Mars turns direct today. I am painfully bad at astrology and any other number of “occult” activities. But I don’t mind. I am just another one of Shiva’s liminal layabouts, ascribing to no one but myself and taking only what I want as I watch myself. Yet I do hope that this heavenly patron will bless me with a springtime abundance for which I have always longed. Or if not that for which I have always longed, that which is best. =/