Approaching another apocalypse, I assess the situation at hand. As I may’ve mentioned- here or in my theatre- the apocalypse is neverending. In my theatre I like to examine the apocalypse, taking into account the nature of eternal time. There’s always another apocalypse, just like in Buffy or any other fun action-packed story. Apo-calypse, Greek apocálypsis, apokalyptein, ἀποκάλυψις, becomes re-vel-ation, from the Latin revelare. Revelation is, of course, exactly what it sounds like. Literally, re-vel… lifting of the veil, is a disclosure. One begins to see what is really there. An older association was “insight, vision; hallucination”- a cataclysmic event is a much more modern invention. Calypso was a nymph, her name translates to Covered, she was perhaps a death goddess, and the root of her name is the origin of the word Hell. If we can apo-calypse, and lift away the hidden, and lift away Hell, imagine the possibilities.
I am so fond of the apocalypse for this and other reasons. Certainly it is a common theme in religion, which I enjoy. Christianity sprang from apocalyptic cult members, and still makes use of apocalyptic motifs. But you see, here’s the thing- there’s a right way to do apocalyptic cult, and there’s a wrong way. Harold Camping? Wrong. Yet we obviously see there are many good ways to practice not only Christianity, but several other religions which have eschatalogical features.
The thing is, one must not become confused that there is an “end” of the world. There is no such thing as the end, for we are eternal, as I have often said in the past. We are also not going to be swept away in a sudden light-show rapture, and we must not rely upon this. Jesus was teaching a true apocalypse two thousand years ago, based upon religions thousands of years older than he- what sort of responsible person (and I know several of these people exist) would then expect the world to end within their lifetime or soon, and so not take into consideration certain consequences?
We are eternal, but all things, all material phenomena, are ephemeral. We ourselves all die. We will continue on forever, but not necessarily as human beings- and if we don’t take care of the planet, our race may die much sooner than need be, no matter what any calendar or apocalyptic preacher says. We must take responsibility now, for ourselves and for our children, to learn how to live in peace and harmony in this holy garden floating around on a giant living rock spaceship. We mustn’t wait around for the Universe, for God, to fix things- we must be responsible enough to fix them ourselves. God and the Universe are conscious, and act, through us. God wants us to take loving care of ourselves; love is the law. There’s no reason to turn cults into nasty business.
As for this current, Mayan apocalypse- well, is it really? Yes and no. The Mayans did not really hold the Christian concept, or shall I say, classical-language-concept, of apo-calypse in their beliefs that we know of for sure, but every culture has their own version. In their calendar, we are reaching a major new cycle. So it is certainly comparable, in the sense that we are reaching a whole new way of things. Of course, it is not the end of the world, for reasons already mentioned- we are eternal/the world never ends, though the planet can- but for some reason, it gained traction as such.
I’m not sure why. The Mayans certainly never thought this- indeed they saw it as a new cycle in much the same way as we might see March turn into April, or the changing of astrological signs. There has been so much hubbub over it that it has indelibly marked the date with apocalyptic quality. So how did this happen?
Well, let me say something further about astrology. I love astrology. I have a passion for it. I’ve been studying it for some years now. At first, I knew next to nothing. But the more I learned, the more I wanted to learn, and the more I saw that even if we study for twenty five years, there’s still so much more to learn. So I might not have been the best astrologer- and I’m still not. But I know a damn sight more now than I once did, and so much more than your average joe, and while I might not know when everything important is about to happen in the sky, it has really helped out my goetic work in many ways.
Astrology is a beautiful mathematical and scientific art- not the same kind of science/knowledge one finds in chemistry in which adding two hydrogen atoms to an oxygen atom will give you a water molecule- but rather the kind of science/knowledge regarding that which breaks down at the very small, and very large, levels. It is beyond rationality- the brain, an organ, a meaty computer, which exists in the middle of scientific parameters and matter, cannot understand the science of the very large and the very small- matter breaks apart by then- but the mind within oneself can.
Astrology’s science gives knowledge of how everything is interconnected, and everything is one, in this one uni-verse. All is held together in the universe in one energy, one love, and one gravity. By observing the patterns and cycles of energy, we can more thoroughly know ourselves, and make more informed decisions. It is not that the future is set in stone- not at all. That sort of fatalism is impossible and boring. Yet by observing these patterns and cycles- when the moon does what, when everything does what- and, having kept track of these patterns, then analyzing them, we can decide when to plant, when to harvest, and how to set our clocks.
Both the Mayan calendar and NASA keep time by the movement of the heavenly bodies such as Venus, and measuring when it has certain relationships with the Sun and so forth. Time can be measured via the orbital motion of Earth and other planets, or the stars, or the oscillations of atoms. We know that Aries is the time of new beginnings, and know that the energy of the universe tends to repeat certain sorts of patterns at those times. That is a time to plant crops, to make war, to prepare for lambs and flowers. Since everything in the universe is interconnected, and everything in the universe exerts gravity on everything else in the universe, from the unimaginably small to the unimaginably large, I find it fascinating and useful to examine the energy play therein.
So, as for patterns and cycles, indeed a very long Mayan cycle is coming to an end, to begin anew. Now, there’s a lot of bullshit out there. Like that there’s some grand alignment- there’s always some grand alignment, but the specific alignment thrown out so often about December 21st, that of the Sun aligning with the Galactic Center, actually occurred a couple of days ago. (Not that it wasn’t wonderful in its own right! Like I said, I love astrology.)
I don’t claim to know all the answers- even though I love ancient religion, I can’t say I know everything about it. I try my best. And I think I do a lot better than certain hacks out there who just want to take your money. There are so many charlatans out there in astrology and religion. (N.B. If anyone tries to use scare tactics and fear to get money out of you, saying that darkness is following you and people are jealous of you, so you need cleansing, and a super important period is coming up you need to take advantage of, a transit period, and that you are a special person good in so many special ways that set you apart, ignore them. This is true of everyone and is just the psychic version of evil marketing, and while cleansing is good, if you are good too, the darkness cannot really harm you unless you let it.)
As I’ve said before, while I enjoy most every religion as something beautiful, every religion has people who practice bullshit too. Because of this, people often blame an entire religion different than theirs as being bullshit. I see it happen all the time- I’m sure you do as well.
I have before said that I was formerly the sort of person who disliked “New Age mumbo-jumbo”. Yet then, before I began these writings, and as I’ve related in them, there came a day when I visited the New Age section of a bookstore. While indeed dismissing a lot of it as nonsense, I picked out books I thought might have the only answers left for me. Answers which are all ultimately within ourselves, but, as someone who had exhausted herself of everything else she’d wanted to do, and not finding happiness, I thought investigating magic might help. And so it did. And so did I immediately see the effects thereof.
Now, what is “New Age?”
Well, it isn’t really a specific religion, much as some people might say so in deriding it. But it is a label applied in certain instances. And while I did not take this label upon myself for some time, and did not like it, I was given it. Why, just trying to be in theatre and teach people to do the right thing got me labeled as a “New Age hippie”. Enjoying practicing yoga techniques- which are the best thing possible for one’s body, which is an actor’s instrument- got me labeled a “New Age hippie”. Pointing to the oneness of the universe got me labeled as a “New Age hippie” who shouldn’t be taken seriously, because she lives in California, and can therefore be dismissed because we all smoke too much green, ma-a-a-an. My logic could never be correct. I am also given other labels, those I’d never heard of or identified with, at that point, for instance, “monist”, and hear that certain people would like to have a party at which bodily harm and violence are committed against those with the label I’ve been given. I am given a label and forced into something that I never said I was, and then “persecuted” for it. (Lord, save me from persecution complexes.) Well, I could say I’m a little tired of that. Luckily, I am on the path of enlightenment and don’t let little things like that bother me. It’s just annoying, like a pest. I have therefore decided:
Fuck it. I’m New Age. Even though that’s not even a fucking goddamn religion. You wanna call me that? FINE. I’ll wear that label as a badge of honor, and anyone who doesn’t like it can suck it.
So why don’t we all try to stop ragging on New Age folk, then? Because now, everytime I hear something disparaging said about “New Age”, I often feel slighted, even if they aren’t necessarily talking about me, because so often have I been labelled such! Why, I was in the New Age section of the bookstore again the other day, and I looked at a copy of some book that had to do with LaVeyan Satanism because it had a pretty pink pentagram on the cover. The description on the back, however, put me off- it told me that Satanism would help me see past all those “New Age idiocies”. You know what? New Age isn’t necessarily all idiotic. And the book is in the fucking New Age section.
Another day, I was looking for some guided meditations to help me cleanse my chakras. I found a nice one and clicked around to the lady‘s other videos. I was then horrified to see that, while I had enjoyed the chakra cleansing video, this lady had an astral traveling meditation that I had once tried to use before, and had put down just as I’d put down the Satanism book. It had even been the first astral travel meditation that popped up when I searched for it on YouTube. I was unpleasantly surprised because at the beginning she has a disclaimer: “You should all educate-yourself to find out the TRUTH about the “new age” deception (starseed lie) its facilitation of the NWO MC” while she has an electronically-affected voice say “Christina Dream Presents” and Enya plays in the background. Let me get this straight. You’re doing an astral travel guided meditation and you’re putting that shit up at the beginning of your video? Are you fucking kidding me?
And then of course there are certain pagans who think syncretism is cool, but New Age? Oh, no, they’re fucking ripping everyone else off, and their syncretism couldn’t possibly hold any water, or any real spiritual value. Even though, guess what, it fucking does. And Crowley agrees with me, because, as I’ll maintain until I’m blue in the face, all religions are in their quiddity identical.
I could go on with Abrahamic, Atheist, Hindu or whatEver examples, but you get the point.
Maybe this all comes down to self-hatred, hatred of ourselves, our communities, and our practices, just like I discussed in an article about theatre recently. We really need to overcome this nonsense. We also need to give up using generalization fallacies. They are my pet peeve. There are those who use them when speaking upon religion- or anything- so, so often! Without ever realizing what is inherently and logically wrong with them! We must banish these fallacious ways from our behaviors.
So then, what is “New Age” that people keep calling me that in harsh tones, or disparaging others for following “its practices”? You know what? Long story real fucking short: It’s about a New Age.
WOAH I didn’t see that coming.
Just like I mentioned earlier about this apocalypse- what is it really? It’s just a new age. A new beginning. The end of one calendrical period and the start of another. It is a time when one cycle and one pattern ends. It is a time when a new cycle and new pattern starts. This one occurs today, on the winter solstice. What is that? Quite simply, it is the time of the year when our part of the Earth is tilted farthest away from the sun, and so, we have the longest night and the shortest day of the year. This Mayan new age coincides with it, and several other holidays fall nearby- Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, and so forth. The ancients would celebrate this time with various holidays as well. I’ve talked about the rebirth of light before, this holy period of the never-ending cycles of life. We are all celebrating the same thing. We all get a chance for rebirth in a new cycle.
The New Age is a spiritual movement that is not organized. You can read a lot about it on Wiki. It syncretizes that which is useful and good in spirituality, religion, science, and art- the metaphysical, psychology, health, quantum physics, and is at once both “pluralistic” and “monist”. It seeks enlightenment and evolution of consciousness. And of course this unorganized movement is so much more. It came about through various persons who called their ways by different labels- I should say, perhaps through many more not listed on the wiki, thousands really. The label is attested perhaps earliest by William Blake, that lovely man, poet, and artist who saw angels and painted them despite his mother having violently discouraged it.
Now here we come to my reflections upon the apocalypse that are personal. So- you already know that I’ve gone ahead and decided to go with the New Age label (even though, if you know me, you’ll know I know that labels are meaningless and that I have so many others, such as Catholic, goetic wizard, yogi, Cleric of Ganymede, actress, writer, producer, kinkster, Aries, Scorpio rising, Pisces moon, Venus dominant, cat-lover, Aphrodite).
A major New Age at play here is, of course, the Age of Aquarius. Astrological ages are a product of precessional rotation and last 2,150 years on average. Astrological ages appear in retrograde, that is, they appear backward. So, some four thousand or more years ago was the age of Aries, some two thousand years ago was the Age of Pisces, and now or later we will be in the Age of Aquarius. I find it fun to imagine the hallmarks of these times and themes through religion and spirituality, as others do- with Moses as a representative of Aries and Jesus as a representative of Pisces. Fun, but again, not an exact, materialistic science.
There are so many guesses as to when this age began or will begin. Astronomers and astrologers have widely varying views, from more than a hundred years in the past and likewise into the future. Carl Jung said that in 1940 we approached the meridian of the first star in Aquarius. Aleister Crowley believes we entered the new Aeon of Horus, rather, in 1904. Considering that the energy of the transit of a planet can be felt a day or two before or after it transits- or even a month with the farthest outer planets- how much moreso must it be with an Age? How could we really pin a start date down?
But we like start dates. And calendars. They give us fresh, new beginnings. I have often wanted a new beginning, and I think I have received several. This Mayan apocalypse offers another, and, like the Age of Aquarius, or the Aeon of Horus, a new age offers a new beginning on such a grander scale than just the New Year.
Now, if you’ve read my blog, you’d realize that I worship Aquarius. Or, shall I say, Ganymede. Ganymede is the name I call out so very often, as naturally as I do God. Ganymede is the name I give to what Crowley would call my Holy Guardian Angel, and what Christians might call the Guardian Angel, and what New Agers might call the Higher Self. Ganymede, raped up into Heaven, is transformed into the constellation Aquarius, the water-bearer, the god of service, in perpetual service to the gods, and is boytoy to Zdeus, the most powerful father god, himself. He pours the waters of enlightenment out for humanity. He is the one thought to control the Nile, and so bless or curse humanity- again I note that ancient astrologers would also track Sirius to determine the pattern and cycles of the Nile. It is interesting to note that further connection with Ganymede and Sirius, which my friend and ex Merlin first brought to my attention.
And though I don’t think I’ve mentioned it, there was a time- when Jupiter was aligning with the Sun, in which I received an apocalypse, a revelation. I’ve had several. This one occurred on my birthday, or just before, considering that, as I’ve said, the effects of the planets’ movements can be felt a day or two before or after- and really, once you get into the real stuff, time just breaks down. It is illusory, after all. Which reminds me that maybe Hair was right- because the Moon is in the Seventh House for a bit every day and Jupiter aligns with Mars several times a year- perhaps the New Age could come anytime; whenever we feel it is so.
In my revelation, the night before my birthday, I was having perhaps one of the very worst days of my life- beaten, forgotten, crying, and so forth. And yet, Jupiter’s exact alignment with the Sun is to be the luckiest day of the year. And in my sign, which only happens once every twelve years! And on my birthday! On this day, spacetime fell apart for me, before me, and I saw all the way out to Jupiter, Mr. Zdeus. And he spoke to me as though I were Ganymede, after a fashion. As is often the case with my revelations, there was an air of disappointment. Why, I wonder? Am I really that disappointing? They tell us that we are all wonderful beautiful snowflakes, and certainly I’ve tried very hard to do my duty- yet I feel a sense of karmic frowning for what reason I know not.
Well. I am disappointed too. Or I was. You see, I’d been wanting this New Baktun of the Mayans to be really quite something special. And I had wanted, I think, to live up to what God, Zdeus, my parents, and certain others who see me as Ganymede, would have wanted, by now. I had wanted, you see, to be so much closer to saving the world than I am right now. I had wanted to make so much more of an impact. An impact has been made, to be sure- but for me, it is not enough! It is far too miniscule for my tastes. My lover, Iakov, tells me that I cannot be expected to save the world. That it is too much responsibility to take onto myself. Yet I feel I can settle for nothing less. I have to at least try. Since I have so often hated the world; I must make it a place I would want to live. I have to make it a place I wouldn’t mind bringing a child into.
However. I find that- here I am. I have done what I could. I have been what many call an amazing, brave, brilliant, and accomplished person, despite the fact I so often do not see this. And I find myself needing to take my own advice- what I had been teaching to everyone else regarding the New Age: That this is a new beginning. I had wanted to be so much more finished by now. But no. I must now begin. I have conquered so many demons, and now that they are behind me, I shall find my way unimpeded. If any more choose to meet me I shall be able to defeat them quickly in zen fashion. And I think using this new calendrical age as a deadline did help motivate me to get more things done and sooner. All the things I have wanted, all the pieces are falling into place. It is time to overcome the illness I developed as a result of not feeling that things were right- it is time to step into being in the right place, now.
This is my new start, and I hope everyone will join me. Some say the New Age requires that everyone be enlightened, in light and love. Perhaps. I think that would be real utopia. But those of us who can must start living it now.
If we take an astrological interpretation- why not- we know that the Age of Aries had its ups and downs. Rules, rituals, and structured civilization helped us evolve, while violence demeaned us. The same with the Age of Pisces. The Age of Aquarius will likely be the same. There are good points and bad points to each sign of the zodiac. I certainly know the downsides after a horrible relationship with an Aquarius. I hope that the Age will not bring these nightmarish parts of Aquarius to light too much- Aquarius is not all light and love. It can be overly detached, intellectual, rigid, unemotional, unfeeling. But I imagine we will have to conquer these things- we are in the process already.
So let’s all conquer the demons and play together in the light. Happy New Baktun. :)